Simple Pure Blue Ch1 & 2
by Rakutu
Summary: This story is about a blue haired boy with a stubborn attitude. Through the story he'll face problems with his family, friends, and sexuality. The drama queen... er, king.. Will go through and tell events and happenings within a one year span of his life. The hectic year swings and climaxes; the unexpected twists and turns will keep you sitting just on the edge of your chair.


**January.**

I'm sixteen years old and can't get my license. I've been sixteen, though. I turn seventeen on August 5th. Carrie thinks that if I get my license it will be to dangerous for me. I faint. It's some kind of condition and I've been told the name of it so many times, but can never seem to remember it. I'm Cecil Ace Dagan and I am at home sitting at the kitchen table with my cyber school computer. Carrie took me out of school when my fainting became more frequent. My grades were dropping significantly because I was never able to be in class. No one is home today. Nick is out with all of his pot-head friends. Carrie is out modeling. The house is silent and it's irritating me to be home alone. As I get up, my head spins and I'm forced to sit back down.  
Can't get up to fast. I close my eyes and take a deep breath. Let's try this one more time; I get up and the feeling in my gut my stomach my heart is gone. I just needed a moment to breath. It's cold in this house and if it's to cold then I shake and when I shake to violently, I faint. Time to turn this heat up. The thermometer button makes a click sound when I press it and hold it in. Eighty degrees will work for now. A raspy sigh escapes my chapped lips when I see the snow falling out the window. The winter is a rough season for me. The cold shook every fiber of my body. Carrie and Nick's home was average. Three floors, a basement that was more like Nick's room. He always has the door locked with friends over and never let's me down there. The living room formed into the kitchen. When you walk into the front door the living room is to the right with the stairs leading up toward the left. Travel through the small hallway and you get to the dining room that is connected to the kitchen. The stairs leading to the basement was adjacent to the dining room. The house was painted in the more dull colors that Carrie and Nick's parents had picked out only years ago. There was hardly a backyard, but it was neatly kept with a garden that Carrie would tend during spring and summer.  
If you are to go up the stairs then you come to a wall with a few family pictures. Turn right and there is a bathroom. Left to that bathroom is my room that used to be Nick's. Carrie had the master bedroom that was to the right of the main bathroom. Carrie usually kept the house very neat and never invaded on my space or Nick's. My room was rather bright colored. I painted it with Nick a few years ago. I liked orange for some reason. Purple curtains and a lime green lamp. The room was small, but worked perfectly for me.  
I walked slowly up the steps and into my room where I throw my cyber school computer on my twin sized bed. I take a seat at my small desk and sit there for a couple moments. I think about how nice it was that Carrie and Nick took me in when I was four. My parents vanished one morning and being a child I went looking for them. Ended up on Carrie's front porch at midnight. Scared and cold. I remember that most of that night.. It was very cold. Nick and Carrie are brothers that also had their parents abandon them although the difference was their parents sent in money at least once a month and they came home for holidays. Nick told me once that their job was in Canada and it was difficult. I still don't understand why they didn't take their children with them.  
Nick and Carrie Jones are two very different and unusual people. Nick enjoys hallucinogens such as shrooms, P.C.P, L.C.D, and ecstasy. He doesn't like to drink, but loves to go to rave like parties and never come home for days on end. Nick takes good care of his brother and sticks up for him right on command. He had never been home drunk or high with Carrie around due to the fact that that would displease Carrie and Nick would probably feel terribly guilty. Nick dropped out of school a little after ninth grade. He's eighteen turning nineteen January 28th. This month.  
Carrie, on the other hand, is a more complex man. He is twenty-four years old and turns twenty-five on December 23rd. Carrie is a cross-dressing model. At first glance, he looks like a beautiful young woman. The legs the hair the eyes the way he talks and even the simple way he walks. Nick is very protective of Carrie because people seem to judge him very quickly. Carrie is a very good man, very kind and I never understood why people acted so cruelly toward him.  
With a yawn, I stand up and undress down into my boxer shorts and the My Chemical Romance shirt that I was wearing under my pink and purple jacket. I was feeling the warmth kick in and it was making me very tired. Today I accomplished nothing on my cyber schooling. I didn't clean my room like Carrie asked. I didn't clean up the pasta dinner I had made only two hours ago. My body was tired and yearning to shut down. Nick's birthday is tomorrow and I was suppose to wait until eight tonight for Carrie to get home to help decorate. It's only seven forty three. I'm exhausted shutting down shutting down shutting down. My face hits the pillow, no blanket over my shoulders, still have my shoes on, and my bright vibrant orange hair covers my dull brown eyes. Its time to sleep, to dream. Goodnight.

January 28th; Nick's birthday party.

I didn't wake up after I fell asleep last night and as I sit up, I realize that I still have my shoes on. Why didn't I think to take those off before going to sleep? The digital clock on my nightstand next to my bed claimed it was nine in the morning. As I rubbed my eyes, I shifted my feet off the bed and took my checkered Vann shoes off. Leaving them on the floor, I get up slowly and walk over to my closet to find fresh clothes. A Pink Floyd shirt, a pair of black skinny jeans works perfectly.  
Half way down the stairs, I stop. It's Nick's birthday today. That means he's not home yet. I need to help Carrie set-up. It was kind of a dick move of me to tell him that I'd help and end up falling asleep.  
I bounced down the rest of the stairs and into the kitchen where Carrie was standing next to the counter, sipping his morning tea.  
"Carrie, I'm sorry I fell asleep last night.." My voice was unusually raspy. I grabbed a cup from the cupboard and filled it up with sink water.  
"It's okay.." Carrie was a quiet individual. His voice was soft, sincere. Nothing ever seemed to bother him.  
"I was able to end up setting up everything in the basement.." I saw him glance at me from the corner of my eye as I drank the water.  
"Well, that's good. I wish I could have helped you out at least, but I fell asleep." I nibbled on the inside of my mouth as I emptied the cup and turned to place it in the dish washer.  
"I figured you would have.." Carrie nodded and took a sip of his tea; his pale blue eyes were now looking out the kitchen window. "Did you get any of your school work finished, Cecil?"  
That question kind of stung me. I always tell Carrie that I'll get my work done, but I never seem to. "Not really... I wasn't really feeling well and I thought that it would have been a better idea for me to.. Be rested for Nick's party." That was my excuse even though I really couldn't have cared less whether I was rested for Nick's party or not. None of his friends talk to me more than a simple 'Hello.' anyway. What would it matter?  
"Alright, Cecil. Just promise me that you'll have all of your work done in June. I know you won't do it during the summer." Carrie walked over to me and kissed my forehead. The touch was warm. "Nick will be here in two hours. Everyone else should be here at ten. Please be ready, okay?" Carries glanced down at me before picking up his teacup and heading for the stairs. "I need to get ready, myself." He said simply and vanished up the stairs.  
I stood there for a moment. The silence was irritating me even though I knew that people would be getting here in an hour or so. Nick arriving shortly after them.  
I walked up the stairs and into my room, shutting the door silently behind me and locking it. I was already dressed for the party, I didn't need to do anything else. I didn't help set the party up, I didn't get Nick a present, I won't be welcoming to his friends because they are never welcoming to me. All I can do is hope the party ends sooner than later.  
With a sigh, I sat down at my desk and took my Apple IPhone off the charger. I actually had a message from Nick and one from his friends. Weird. His friends never text me.  
Nick's message read; "Hey, I'll be home around eleven, 'ight?"  
I didn't bother answering.  
The one from his friend. Kevin. "Ay cutie, you gonna be at Nick's party right?"  
'Cutie'? I've probably only met this kid a few times and he's always had an eye out for me. I've even asked Nick about it and he told me that I should probably hook up with him. Although, Kevin was quite the trouble maker. No thanks. I won't reply to that message, either.  
The moment I put my phone in my pocket, there was a few knocks at my door. "Cecil.." It was Carrie. I get up and unlock the door, opening it to look up at Carrie's pale blue eyes. Instantly, my gaze falls to the floor. I don't like keeping eye contact with people.  
"I know it's urgent, but my work just called me in and I have to go..." There was a glint of sorrow in Carrie's eyes. "I didn't want to miss Nick's party this year, but I have no choice.. Could you greet his friends when they get here and show them to the basement? I already called Nick and told him.. I can't make it."  
I just stood there and nodded to everything he said. I watched as Carrie walked down the stairs, I heard him grab the keys off the counter and I heard him open the door to leave. I was by myself again. The car started outside. All alone. I heard the car drive off into the distance. I didn't want to greet Nick's friends.  
Once Carrie said the words '..I already called Nick and told him..', my heart dropped. Nick now knew that Carrie wasn't going to be here and therefore.. This party just took another step up. There was going to be drugs and there was going to be alcohol. The most Nick has ever brought into the house was Marijuana. He wouldn't dare bring any harder drugs into Carrie's house.  
I heard the door bell ring and I jumped, my heart began to pound and as I walked down the stairs I placed my hand on my chest. Before I opened the door, I took a deep breath.  
I opened the door.  
"Uhm, hello." My voice was small. At the door was Cameron Kat. Nick's "best friend".  
"Hey, Cecil. I know I'm early and shit." His skinny shoulders shrugged. I invited him in and lead him down the basement stairs. When we got down there, even I was shocked at what a great job Carrie did at setting the place up. He was probably up all night long.  
There were black lights, small strobe lights, purple and red lava lamps, the fish tank that sat in the far corner of the room even had color changing lights. The bean bag chairs looked new, there was a bucket of glow sticks in the middle of the glass coffee table. Everything seemed to be set up pretty nicely.  
"Carrie did one fucking good job, didn't he?" Cameron spoke as he sat down on the couch, making himself comfortable.  
"Yeah, he did..." I quietly said as I turned around and began to walk up the stairs, but turned around to glance over at Cameron. "Nick will be here in an hour."  
"Oh. I know." Cameron said.  
As I walked slowly up the stairs, in the corner of my eye, I saw Cameron take something out of his pocket. Probably weed. It's always weed.

By the time the last person arrived at the party, it was ten thirty. There were five boys downstairs waiting for Nick. I chose to wait up stairs for Nick. I'd rather greet him at the door and then head for my room to leave them all alone. I don't like being around the kind of people that Nick hangs around.  
There was Cameron Kat. The first one to arrive. Nick's 'best friend' and from what I know, a very big pot-head. All he really cares about is Marijuana. I hear Nick on the phone with him all the time. Cameron has been around for about over a year now. It's the longest 'friendship' that I've ever seen Nick carry out. Cameron is really secretive, though. Not mysterious nor sexy in any way. Just shady. His white hair is kind of his signature. Along with his lip, eyebrow, nose, and ear piercings. He doesn't treat me badly, but then again we never really exchange much words. Cameron is respectful toward Carrie, though. That might be the reason he's been sticking around longer than any other.  
There is also Kevin Soprano. The one that texted me and called me cute. Kevin as been Nick's friend for a couple months. He's a pretty loud guy. Obnoxious, if you ask me. I don't really know anything about him except that he's probably been with every girl in Nick's school. A man-whore, probably.  
Then there is Alexandra Sullivan. I don't know anything about him except he's got a girl name and he's given Nick a few blow jobs in the past. Nick brings Alex around when Carrie isn't home. He probably wasn't even invited to the party until Nick found out that Carrie wasn't going to be there.  
Theo Turner was also here. He was a very weird one. I've only met him one other time, but that kid doesn't really like to eat anything. He is a strict vegan, I think. Quiet most of the time, not much of a bother.  
Last but not least there is this new guy named Arizona. I don't know his last name or anything about him. He's got a nice looking face, I suppose and some pretty large gauges. Claimed to have met Nick at the beach last summer.  
I was about to fall asleep on the living room couch when I heard the doorbell ring a few times. I got up and dragged my feet as I walked toward the door, opened it to see Nick's gleaming white smile and dazzling dark brown eyes.  
"Cecil~!" He cheered and leaped into the house, hugging me until I couldn't really breathe.  
"Gah!" I almost lost my breath. "Nick, you idiot, shut the damn door, it's cold outside!"  
Nick bounced backward and shut the door, locking it. As he started toward the kitchen, he punched me in the arm. "What's your problem? We're about to have a party, loosen up Cecil."  
I heard a slight tone of mockery in his voice. I followed him into the kitchen and leaned against the far counter, my arms crossed. "You mean _you're parting_. I'm not. I don't "party" and you know that." I made sure the bitter sound in my voice was heard.  
"Oh, but tonight.." Nick looked at his reflection in the glass window above the kitchen sink and adjusted his fine black hair before turning to me, "You are going to party with us!"  
My eyes widened for a moment and my heart sunk deep into my stomach. "S-Say what..? No." I shook my head. "I'm not going down there. All you guys do is-" Nick waved his hand dismissively.  
"Sorry to rudely interrupt!" He grinned down at me. "But I think you should come down. I'll keep my eye on ya! Y'know I always do, Cecil. Just come down for an hour. I promise everything will be okay." Nick walked toward the door to the basement and held the door open for me.  
For some reason, I didn't really trust him. But I walked through the door and down the steps anyway, Nick shortly followed me and I heard him shut the door behind him.  
I looked at all the boys and bit down nervously on my lower lip as I took a seat on the couch. The boys made room for Nick, who sat next to me.  
"Cameron! Go get the fucking bong, dude!" Nick cheered as he then got up and walked over the the small refrigerator that was down here. He grabbed a bottle of vodka and a stack of red plastic cups. This wasn't going to be good, I felt it deep in my gut that this will end badly. For me, at least.  
Nick sat back down next to me and placed the tall bottle of vodka on the glass coffee table. Cameron got Nick's chameleon glass bong from the closet.  
"You want ice in this?" Cameron smirked as he looked solemnly over at Nick.  
"Fuck yeah, dude!" Nick laughed and took out his own amount of Marijuana. I could smell it from just sitting here. The other boys laughed along with Nick and gather the bean bag chairs around the glass coffee table. I took a slow breath and closed my eyes for a moment. Nick was pouring drinks for everyone, Cameron was packing the bong's bowl pack, the other boys were talking back and forth about things I didn't bother tuning into. I just wanted to leave. I wanted to leave and not be down here. I've tried Marijuana before. I didn't like it as much as Nick thought I would have. With my fainting problem, it only made me want to sleep more than I already did. The effects of the drug took all my physical pain away and I got great sleep, but the day after... All my joints and muscles would ache. Nick told me that it wasn't that normal, but it happens to some people. It bothered me.  
"Nick, since it's your birthday, you get the greens." Cameron, still wearing a shady smirk, handed the bong to Nick. Greens was the first hit. Obviously, because it's all green and none has burned yet.  
"Psh, thanks. Oh, and I'm gonna pass it this way, 'ight?" Nick grinned a wide toothy grin and pointed his thumb in my direction. As Nick hits the bong, the water in the bottom bubbled and I heard the ice at the bottom start to slightly crack. For some reason, I've felt eyes on me. I smelt the Marijuana strong as I glanced at the boys that were surrounding the glass coffee table. That Arizona kid was talking to Theo. Alex was listening to Arizona speak, but I caught him glancing over at Nick a few times. My eyes finally landed on Kevin, who was closets to me. It was him, the pair of eyes that I kept feeling on me.  
Just that moment, Nick nudged me and handed me the bong. I took it, it was heavy. I glanced up at Nick and frowned, I didn't want this. Why must he insist on trying to get me to smoke with him? This isn't the first time he's tried, either. But I guess since I've tried it before, and I suppose it wouldn't hurt. Maybe he'd get off my case about smoking with him.  
I took the lighter from him and placed my mouth on the opening at the top of the bong. I lit the Marijuana and began to take a deep breath in. The breath felt like forever. I think I forgot how to work this..  
"Whoa, whoa! Calm the fuck down Cecil! Damn!" Nick laughed as he pulled the slider from the bong, "Now inhale! Go, go, go!" I inhaled as fast and as deeply as I could. The smoke was cold and it hit me hard. I coughed and the smoke came out. Everyone laughed, I heard a person clapping. The only thing I could concentrate on was how bad the coughing was hurting my chest.  
Nick took the bong from me and handed it to the left, which was Kevin. From Kevin it went to Alex, then Theo who didn't smoke, so he passed it to Arizona, then to Cameron. Then back to Nick again.  
That hit me hard, tears formed in my eyes and I had to wipe them away before anyone saw them. "Hnn.." I leaned closer to Nick to tell him something. I was high, I wouldn't admit it but I was. I forgot what I was going to say to Nick until he bumped me and passed me the bong again.  
"Calm down on this one, alright?" When he laughed, it seemed to echo. "Oh, yeah guys! This is laced with a little bit of Acid, just so you know. You'll be seein' tracers." I heard Nick and Cameron talking about some time they got high and their weed was laced with ecstasy. I took a smaller hit off the bong and then passed it to Kevin. I slowly stood up, without saying a word and walked toward the steps. I heard people asking me where I was going or if I'd be back. I decided not to answer and just to walk away. Everything was moving so slowly, when I moved I saw things duplicate for a moment. It was beginning to scare me.  
I shut the basement door and walked into the living room to lay on the couch. It was far to complicated to climb up another set of stairs. I fell down onto the couch and lied there. My body felt slow and tired, but my brain wanted to keep working. I couldn't get to sleep. It felt like several minutes, maybe even an hour, that I was laying there just staring up at the ceiling. My high didn't even lighten up, I hated this. I regret ever doing this. Just as my thoughts started to get negative, I heard the door to the basement open and close. Who was that? Who was there?  
I sat up slowly, I was getting a light-headed feeling as I looked up and saw Nick approach me.  
"U-Uhm.. Hey.." I stuttered like an idiot, my voice was low and quiet.  
"Hi, Cecil." Nick said as he took his dark blue... Or purple jacket off and dropped it on the floor. He sat next to me, smelt a little like alcohol.  
"You, erm... Uh.. Need anything?" I asked.  
"Not really." Nick's voice was surprisingly soothing.  
"Oh, well.." I stopped talking as Nick slowly got closer to my face. He leaned down and into the nook of my neck and I was caught way off guard as he began to kiss me. He kissed up along my neck and jaw line. The kisses felt good, his lips and breath were warm.  
"Hnn.." A tiny moan escaped from my lips as Nick reached his hand slowly up my shirt. His kisses stopped for a moment so that he could take my shirt off. The air was cool around my body, gave me chills up and long my spine. "Ah... N-Nick.. Wait, stop it-" I was cut off when his lips met mine, his tongue rubbed gracefully against mine. It turned me on, I arched my back into him and wrapped my legs around his waist. I was to high to realize how random it was for him to just come up here and act this way toward me. Its been a long time since he's acted this way. Since he's kissed me this way.  
I wrapped my arms around his neck and in that moment, he stood. Nick held me up and began to head upstairs, we stumbled up the steps until my back brushed against the wall, Nick's knee gave out on one of the steps. He pushed his lips against mine, kissing me with such intensity. It was like it was.. _Almost_passion. My current state of mind wouldn't allow me to determine what was really going on. All I knew was that it felt good. Nick slid one of his hands down to unbutton my pants, he slowly pulled the zipper down; he stuck his hand deep inside my pants, caressing me through my boxers. I broke the kiss abruptly and my body tensed. "W-Whoa.. Nick... St-" Again, he stopped me from talking, kissing me intently and rubbing me ever so gently. Nick pulled his hand away and wrapped it back around my body. He carried me up the stairs and into my bedroom where he kicked the door shut behind him. He lied me on the bed, began to kiss my neck again, my collar bone, his kisses trailed lower and lower. Before I knew it, my pants were off. So were his. Everything was moving quickly, his hands, his mouth, him. It was the last thing I remembered...

**February.**

It's been about two weeks since Nick's birthday party. I can't get what happened out of my head, although I can only remember fragments of what had happened. I remember the potent smell, his hands on me.. I remembered his warmth. I shook my head and picked up the remote to my small flat screen television that was hung on the wall in the corner of my room.  
As I flipped through the channels I heard the front door open. I clicked the television off and listened to the whispers coming from down the stairs. It was Nick and Cameron.  
"I can't believe you..." The voices were muffled.  
"I know, but it didn't even-" The whispers were getting lower. I think they heard my television turn off.  
"You shouldn't have done that, Nick.." That deeper voice was Cameron's. What were they talking about?  
"Well, it was a while ago and I was pretty fu-" Nick's voice was cut off, Cameron's voice was getting louder. It sounded pretty obvious that he was angry.  
"I don't want to fucking hear it," Cameron's voice was still a whisper, but the tone was angry making it more solid and easy to hear, "You know how he is, Nick. It wasn't even that long ago. I didn't say anything then, but it was a fucking bad idea."  
Nick didn't say anything after that and I heard the creaks from the floor board in the kitchen, I heard them get ice from the freezer. I sat up in my bed, rested my back against the wall. I know what they were talking about, but why would Nick tell Cameron that? Nick told Cameron about that night.. About how he fucked around with me that night. I let him, though. Why should I even care? I liked it.. But then why do I still get this feeling in the pit of my stomach every time I think about it? I needed to get out of the house, but I have no close friends. I have no one to get me out of here.  
I reached over and grabbed my IPhone off the charger from the nightstand and began to scroll through my contacts. Most of them were Nick's friends. I never bother talking to any of these people. I just wanted to leave. I couldn't sit here and do nothing for another night. Somehow I needed to make Nick jealous. Or at least make him realize I know people that can hold my attention long and better than he could.  
With a sigh, I got up and slipped into my shoes. I walked down the steps and took my navy blue American Eagle winter coat and wrapped it around myself. As I slipped my phone into my pocket and opened the door, Cameron grabbed my shoulder and it startled me causing me to swing around and accidentally back into the door. "Ouch, shit..." I murmured as I rubbed the back of my head.  
"Are you alright? I didn't mean to startle you." Cameron's voice was deep. Sounded lonely in a way.  
"Yeah, uhm. I'm fine. Its whatever." I didn't make eye contact with him.  
"I was just about to leave.. And I see you are to, uh..." He paused for a moment, "Nick is downstairs.." He said it as if I cared where he was.  
"So?" My reply was short, my attitude could be heard easily.  
"Uh..." Cameron reached and opened the door back up. "What time is it?"  
I wrinkled my nose in disgust, how would I know the time? What would it matter? "How the fuck would I know?"  
I could feel Cameron's eyes on me. "Because Nick is downstairs getting some sleep and I was just wondering if you would like to go get some food or whatever. We could go to some fast food place."  
This utterly shocked me. This was the most Cameron has ever even talked to me.  
"You don't have to, never mind." Cameron said quickly. He must have seen the look on my face.  
"I'll go." I muttered as I opened the door all the way and stepped outside. It was cold, the winter was surely here and as bitter as ever before. I shivered and wrapped my arms around myself as I stood next to the passenger side door to Cameron's black Toyota. "I'm freezing my ass off, please.."  
Cameron nodded and quickly shut the door to the house. He walked over and crawled into the driver's side, leaned over and opened the door for me. I rushed in as fast as I could. I looked over at Cameron, who was starting the car, his white hair amazed me. It was natural. He also had so many silver piercings and always wore that black beanie.  
"Why are you doing this?" I asked him after the car was starting to back out of the driveway.  
"...What do you mean?" I saw him glance at me from the corner of his eye as he shifted the car into drive.  
"Like..." I hesitated for a moment, "Why did you offer to take me?" My eyes narrowed for a moment.  
"I don't know, honestly..." He lied, I could tell. "Uhm, where would ya like to go eat?"  
I ignored the question. "You do know why." I was starting to get attitude with him.  
He nibbled on his lip ring, the sound of the titanium against his teeth made me slightly wince. "Well, I know what all happened with you and Nick and shit.." I thought I saw a hint of emotion in his facial expression, but I couldn't tell. "His birthday party night. He told me."  
I knew he did. That night... I couldn't even really remember it. I sat in silence and glared out the window. It was starting to snow.  
"He shouldn't have done that." In Cameron's voice it sounded like he was sorry for me. "If I would have known he was gonna pull that shady shit I wouldn't have let him leave the basement."  
I grunted and rolled my eyes, looking over at Cameron. "Negative." I mumbled as I took my phone out and got on Facebook. "It wouldn't have made a fucking difference.. Why are you talking to me about this. Its none of your business... And why would you care anyway?" I glared at him again and I knew he could feel it.  
"You fell for him. You wouldn't have stopped him or nothin." He took a deep breath and pulled into the drive-through to McDonald's. There was a car line of about four other cars. This was going to take a little while. I looked at the clock, it was getting to be five o'clock and people were getting off work. It was rush hour traffic and people wanted to eat fast, another car pulled in behind Cameron's.  
"I like him." Cameron said, looking straight ahead with a scowl on his pale face. "A lot. I know how you feel, maybe... I dunno, in a way I guess."  
This shocked me, but then again I wasn't to surprised. "Hmph..." I ran my hands through my orange hair and looked at Cameron. He met my eyes for a moment before I looked away again. The car link moved a little.  
"He uses people... Y'know? Makes 'em feel like he wants 'em." Cameron shrugged his shoulders, "I'm kinda attracted to 'em, y'know... Like, uh... I dunno. We've been friends for like almost a year or somethin' and he talks about it like we're datin' or whatever.. Makes me wish we were in a way." He stopped talking and rubbed his face. The car line moved again, it was almost our turn to order.  
"He leads me on an' shit, like.." As Cameron paused I wondered why he was telling me all of this and I wondered why I was sitting here actually listening to him. "Like, I know he's just gonna lead me on over an' over again, but... Part of me don't really give a shit." It was our turn to order, he turned to me, "What would you want? I'm buyin'." He turned and ordered what he wanted and then adverted his gaze back to me, I wasn't looking at him, but I could feel his eyes on me.  
"Uhm, a milkshake would be cool... And chicken nuggets?" I glanced at him for a moment than back at my hands which were sitting in my lap fidgeting.  
"'Ight." Cameron turned again and said my order to the lady on the other end. She said thank you and told us to pull up to the next window. There were two other cars in front of us still waiting on their food.  
"I kind of want him some times..." Cameron started again. "But I can't. All I can do is sit here and be his friend while he goes off and fucks with everyone.." His voice got colder as he said that. "He does it all the fuckin' time, like what I have to say or my feelin's or whatever don't matter at all."  
What Cameron was saying was true, Nick always did that kind of stuff to everyone. "He's kept you around longer than anyone..." My voice was small, but I know he heard me as he pulled up to the window. He paid for everything and got the food, putting my milkshake and a Coke he ordered in the cup-holders, handing the bag to me so he could drive. The bag was warm and the food smelt so good. I haven't eaten fast food in the long time. Cameron pulled into the parking lot to the Walmart grocery store that was across the street and turned the car off. I handed the bag of food to him and he got his food out, handing me the bag with my food in it. He got a large fry and began to eat them slowly. I got out my chicken nuggets and took a bite of one.  
"Sorry if you don't feel like hearin' me rant an' shit, but I just needed someone to talk to, y'know?" He looked at me and shrugged. I understood.  
"Yeah.. I know. Nick can be pretty... Stupid." I picked up my milkshake and took a sip."Oh, uhm.. Thanks for the food and stuff.. It was nice of you." I finished off the chicken nugget, I had three left.  
"No problem at all, Cecil." Cameron ate a few more fries and offered them to me, I took a few and put them in the box with my chicken. "Are you and Nick close?" I asked, figuring that they were, but I just wanted to try and encourage him to talk.  
"I dunno." He muttered and took a drink of his soda.  
"You guys seem like it." I said and then began to eat some more.  
"Possibly..." Cameron sighed and looked at me, I could feel his eyes on me. He was watching me.. I hate when people watch me, I could feel my self starting to blush. I heard him chuckle, he noticed it.  
"..What?" I glared at him and frowned. "D-Don't freaking watch me.."  
He laughed this time and his laugh was rather handsome. "Why? You're cute." I looked over at him, he grinned at me. "And I'm not hitting on you, either. I'm just sayin'."  
"Uh, whatever.." I grunted and smiled as I looked away from him, eating the rest of my food and putting the trash back in the paper bag it came in. "Well, you actually smiled for once. You never do." He stated with a smart-ass attitude behind it.  
"What's it matter? I doesn't make a difference.. I don't have anything or anyone to smile for." I simply shrugged my shoulders and picked my milkshake up, sipping it.  
"Yeah, but still... I dunno." Cameron chuckled again and ate a few more fries before handing the rest to me and starting the car. "Where would you like to go now?" He asked me as if we were hanging out, as if he actually wanted to hangout with me.  
"Uhm.. Somewhere warm." I replied and dipped a fry in my milkshake.  
"Alright, cause I'm still not done talkin' to ya." Cameron backed out of his parking space. "I like to talk to you."  
This was a pleasant surprise. Just knowing that someone actually wanted to talk to me made me feel a little less lonely. I looked out the window and it looked cold outside. The snow was just in flurries and it was pretty. It wasn't laying on the road yet, but it was beginning to leave a thin coating over the grass and trees. The sky was rather grey, making it seem as if it was later in the evening. I was in the mood to sit by a fire and drink some warm coffee or something. That's just the kind of day it was. Although, sitting here in Cameron's warm car was just as nice. I shifted in my seat and glanced over at him. Maybe I could actually have a friend. It would be nice, having someone to call or text if I needed to talk. Hopefully that's what this was.  
"Uhm.." Cameron spoke, interrupting my train of thought. "We could go back to my place for a little while, just to hangout?"  
That actually sounded pretty good. I liked the idea so I nodded. "Yeah, sure." I said as I looked out the window again and began to space out. The movement of the car, everything blurring by, the sound of the engine, it all kind of put me in a light trance. It was nice to get out of the house. We drove past a farm that had a lovely blanket of snow on top of everything, we drove past the mall and took a turn down some back road. The scenery was pretty. The snow made everything lighter despite the gray clouds. We slowly turned into what looked like a driveway, it was long and narrow with woods on one side and a small development on the other, we took another turn and there was the house. It was average sized and looked very modern. "Is this your house..?" I asked as the car stopped and the engine cut off. "Yeah, it is. Well, more of my parents' home. I don't own it or nothin'." He laughed and opened the door, stepping out of the car, I followed shutting the door behind me. "Its nice." I said as he twisted a key in the front door and stepped inside. I followed him in and shut the door behind me. It was cold outside and stepping into a warm house made me shiver. We both took our shoes off at the front door.  
"We can hangout in my room, talk an' shit." Under the lighting of the house, Cameron looked rather... sexy, in a way. I blushed and nodded as he started walking up the stairs. I followed him, climbing the steps and looking around. His house was very modern, neat, and organized. His parents obviously kept the house orderly.  
We made it to his room. It was average sized, he had a bed that sat low to the ground in the right corner, a single window that faced out to the backyard. A glass bookshelf, a glass end table, a glass nightstand, a black tall metal dresser with glass knobs, his closet doors had glass knobs, a black metal lamp on the nightstand, and the ceiling fan matched accordingly. There was a fish bowl and a silver lava lamp sitting on top the dresser. His room was all glass or a black metal. "Hm..." I looked around and then sat on the bed. "This is... very, uh... interesting.." I continued to look around.  
"Thank you," He chuckled, "Its alright. I don't usually let people in cause its all glass an' shit."  
"I could understand that, yeah.." I looked at him as he sat next to me on the bed.  
"But, uhm.." I could easily tell he had something on his mind.  
"What?" I asked.  
"Why did you fall for Nick? Like, how?"  
I hesitated for a moment and bit my tongue before I spoke, "Well..Carrie and Nick took me in.. and after time.. he took care of me and with my, uh, fainting thing..." I scratched my arm and wiggled my toes on the white carpet. "He just showed me attention more than anyone else ever had. That's all." I didn't want to talk about it anymore. It made me sick to even think I 'loved' Nick Jones.  
"I get it..." Cameron said, he could tell that I didn't want to talk about it. "I'll probably get over him, honestly. Its just a small crush of some sorts." He sighed and ran his fingers through his hair,making his hat fall off.  
Cameron was beautiful. His pale eyes, his snow white hair, his deep seductive voice. I found myself fantasizing and quickly realized that I was blushing. I rubbed my eyes and bit down onto my lower lip. Nervous. But why?  
"Are you okay?"  
I heard him, but didn't respond right away. "Uh.." I suddenly realized I haven't fainted all day, but I was getting light headed now. I had butterflies fluttering around in my stomach. "..Yeah."  
"Are you sure? You don't look good."  
His deep voice. The room was spinning, I placed my hands on my knees and squeezed them.  
"Cecil?"  
His warm hand on my shoulder.  
I closed my eyes and took slow breaths as I slid my hand into the pocket of my jeans and pulled out a tablet. My medicine which had to be snapped in half after I were to faint and held in front of my nose. Something about the smell woke me back to reality. I opened my eyes and glanced over at Cameron who was sitting there looking at me with a hint of worry in his expression. He was beautiful right now. I handed him the tablet and then closed my eyes again. It hurts, kind of.. The feeling I get before I'm about to pass out. I squeezed my eyes closed, I felt it. Then I felt his arms around me, he moved closer to me on the bed and held me against him. I burrowed my face into his jacket and smelt his soft musk. He smelt beautiful. I took a few more breaths before everything went black...

I woke up coughing and wheezing, as if my lungs weren't absorbing the oxygen I was trying to take in. I nearly jolted to sit upward but I ran into something warm and soft. My coughs were getting more violent, but I knew they would be over soon. I smelt him again, Cameron was holding me and gently rocking back and forth. "Shh..." He whispered, his deep voice. "It'll be okay.." My breathing was heavy, I squeezed my eyes closed. He didn't say anything else, just held me as my breathing slowly faded back to normal again. It was embarrassing. Fainting around people always made me feel as if I was doing something wrong. I remember how Nick would always hate bringing me around his friends or in public in general. When I first came into the family he was all about my health. He loved to be there for me, I could see the passion in his eyes every time I'd wake back up. It has just been recently that he just stopped caring for me...  
"Cecil.. Are you alright now?" Cameron's deep velvet voice halted my thoughts and concentration. I shook my head yes and pulled away from him, not daring to make any eye contact as I wiped the wetness from my eyes.  
"You kind of scared me." Cameron laughed, "Nick told me that you do that often..."  
"Yeah.." My voice was quiet. I ran my fingers through the orange strands of hair in my face. I needed a haircut.  
"You need a drink or something?" He placed a hand on my shoulder and scooted closer to me on the bed.  
His leg touching mine. I could feel his warmth. I shrugged my shoulders and glanced over at him through my hair.  
"C'mon, I'll get ya one." He said and stood up offering his pale hands to me. I placed my hands in his and let him help me up.  
"Just follow me to the kitchen." Cameron said as he walked out of the room. I followed him down the stairs and into they kitchen which was a pretty green with a black and white checkered floor. Very modern. The refrigerator was huge and I shivered as the cool air drifted from it as he opened it.  
"What would you like?" Cameron said as he stepped aside to let me look in. I wrapped my arms around myself as I took a few steps forward. "Uhm.." There was numerous different beverages that looked delicious. "Can I have Mountain Dew with ice?" I timidly asked as I backed away from the fridge.  
"Absolutely." I caught a glimpse of his smile and as I stood there and watch him... He took my breath away. It was this feeling again. He reached for the glass. That feeling I get in the pit of my stomach. He got the ice cubes from the front of the fridge. As I stand here and watch him...  
He poured me the drink and returned the bottle of Mountain Dew to the fridge. Cameron handed me the drink and I took it.  
"Thanks." I mumbled as I took a drink.  
"No problem, dude." Cameron grinned a little bit then started walking over toward the steps. "You can bring it upstairs if you want."  
"Okay.." I said as I took another small sip from the glass and began to slowly follow him up the stairs.  
When I made it to his room, he was taking a seat on the bed. Cameron looked up at me and patted the seat next to him. "Can I have a sip of that?" He chuckled, "I should have made my own glass, but I wasn't thinkin'."  
"Oh, yeah.. Of course." I handed him the drink and sat down on the bed next to him. He sat Indian-style, taking a drink then setting it on his desk. I could feel his eyes on me, I felt my heart kind of flutter.  
"Me and Nick have a party to go to around eleven tonight..." He said, eyes still on me. I could feel them. "I don't really think I want to go, but he's all excited." I could hear the disappointment in his voice as he spoke. I sat there and didn't say anything, waiting for him to keep talking. "I get to just watch him suck fucking face with everyone... Well, that or either dance like an idiot." I saw his shoulders shrug in the corner of my eye.  
"Why do you like him if he keeps doing that... I mean.." I paused, recollecting my thoughts, "I didn't catch on that quickly, but... Uhm, I don't know.."  
"No, you're right." Cameron sighed and shifted on the bed. "My attraction for him has been gettin' less and less due to what I've been seein."  
My phone vibrated in my jeans which made me jump. I took my IPhone from my pocket and unlocked it. It was Carrie, asking me if I was home.  
"Ah... Its Carrie.." That probably meant I needed to be home. I looked at the time which read nine fifteen.  
"What's that mean?" Cameron asked, there was some sort of emotion behind his voice that I couldn't pinpoint. "What time is it?"  
"Almost nine twenty.. I never usually leave the house and I forgot to tell Carrie, so... We should probably head back soon." I honestly didn't want to leave. It felt great to get out of the house and felt great to know that I now had a person to talk to now. I wasn't alone.  
"Damn... Nick will probably wake up within an hour or so anyway." Cameron shrugged his shoulders and stood, grabbing his jacket from the floor.  
"You guys still going to that party thing tonight..?" I tried my hardest to hide this tone that was in my voice. I was feeling kind of jealous. I wanted to spend more time with Cameron and I wanted to get to know him.  
"Mmm..." Cameron rubbed his face and looked down at me.  
I don't think I could let him know how much I wanted him to stay and keep me company.  
"Yeah, probably." He sighed as he handed me my navy blue American Eagle coat.  
"Have fun I guess." I muttered under my breath as I took the coat from him and stood up to put it on.  
I followed Cameron down the stairs, we slipped our shoes on and he held the front door open for me telling me to shut it behind me. He got in the car and started it, sitting there rubbing his hands together. I was freezing, wrapping my arms as tightly as I could around myself and watching my breath every time I exhaled.  
"Its fuckin' freezing out here." Cameron shivered as he pulled out of the driveway and turned the heat on low. I just nodded my head and sat in the passenger seat in silence.  
"Uhm..." He mumbled, I glanced at him than back out the window. It was dark outside, the grass was already beginning to frost over. The street lamps dimly lit the road and sidewalks. No one was outside, no small animals were out and about either. All trees and plants were bare. I looked up at the dark sky, the moon was bright and illuminated the clouds there were scattered around it. The stars were beautiful, and there was so many of them.  
The sound of his voice interrupted my thoughts, "Cecil..." I looked at the houses around us, we were getting closer Carrie's house, than I shifted my gaze to him and caught a glimpse of his eyes on me. "I really enjoyed your company today." His tone of voice was different. I saw the muscles around his jaw flex as if he was clenching his teeth. Was he nervous?  
I felt a heat on my face at the words he had said, shifting my gaze back out the window in hopes he wouldn't notice. "I..." My voice was quiet, "I, uhm... I had a good day..." My voice was shaky, "I... Uh, I like hanging out with you." I bit my lower lip and squeezed my eyes closed for a moment and when I opened them we were pulled into the driveway to Carrie and Nick's house which was all mutual colors and very plain but defiantly homely. "A-And thanks for the food and talking to me." I quickly opened the door and stepped out of his car. I was afraid of what he would say or how he would look at me so I rushed up to the front door, but before I could reach for the door knob I felt a warmer grip around my wrist. "Wait a moment there." Cameron's voice was soft as he turned me around and pulled me close to him, I felt his warmth. And then he hugged me, arms around my waist. My heart was pounding fast, I didn't expect this. "U-Uhm.." I stuttered as I let him hug me. I couldn't find the courage within myself to hug him back.  
He let me go and then reached for the door knob, holding the door open for me. "Thanks for listening to me." He said as we walked in and took our shoes off. Cameron shut and locked the door behind us. "Likewise..." I murmured as I began to walk up the steps. "Carrie! I'm home!" I yelled as I walked into my room and shut my door. I couldn't believe he hugged me. I couldn't believe I was growing some sort of attachment to him after only one day of hanging out with him. I lied down on my bed and listened for what I could from downstairs. Cameron was talking to Carrie.  
"...Where did you two go?" It was Carrie. His voice seemed so confused.  
"I just wanted someone to talk to. Where's Nick?" Cameron didn't bother explaining and quickly changed the subject to Nick.  
"Oh my..." Carrie's tender voice, "He's down in the basement."  
I heard Cameron mumble a 'thank you' before hearing footsteps head toward the basement. What was I doing? I doubted that Cameron would say anything to Nick about today, but I couldn't help to worry. Why did Cameron hug me? My mind was spinning until I heard a gentle knock on my door. My thoughts stopped as I spoke. "Come in." Carrie peeked in before actually just walking in and shutting the door behind him.  
"Cecil-" Carrie began, but I rudely interrupted.  
"What, Carrie?" I demanded, but kept talking. "I just went out to get a bite to eat. That's it. Sorry I didn't tell you. I just want to sleep. Please." I mumbled as I buried my face into my pillow.  
"Cecil, let me speak darling." I felt him sit on the bed next to me and place his delicate hand on my shoulder. "You don't have to tell me anything if you do not wish to. Cameron, of course, can be as much of your friend as Nick's." I heard him sigh, but most of my attention was focused on his hand peacefully rubbing my shoulder and back. A soothing touch. "I do want you to talk to me. I also would like you to know that you can." I heard the sympathy in his voice so I slowly pushed myself up and sat against the wall behind my bed, not making eye contact as I spoke. "I know I can talk to you, Carrie..." I inhaled slowly and frowned.  
"I'm not in any trouble and I think things will be okay." I said and rubbed my face, my eyes, running my fingers through my hair.  
"That's all that matters then." The way Carrie spoke always relieved me. I felt his usual warm and caring smile on his words.  
"Thank you." I looked up at him and crawled over, wrapping my arms around him gingerly.  
"Of course." He embraced me back and then stood, exiting my room and shutting the door behind him. The day has been a rather long one and as I lied back down and pulled my blanket up over my head, I thought. My eyelids began to feel heavy and I didn't fight them as they fell shut.

My stomach growling and the fact I needed to use the bathroom woke me up. I was sill dressed in jeans and my jacket which wasn't comfortable at all. I sat up, rubbed my eyes and began to take off my sweatshirt and jeans. I put the clothes on the floor and got up to get a pair of black and red striped pajama pants. I glanced in the mirror and made a face to how my hair looked, it was messy and needed to be redyed. With a sigh, I walked from my room and into the bathroom to pee.  
I walked back into my room and took my iPhone from my pants that were on the floor and plugged it in to the charger next to my bed than checked the time. It was only eleven. Nick and Cameron were at that party and the thought of it made my stomach feel upset. I set my phone down and lied back down in my bed, recollecting my thoughts about the day I had. I closed my eyes and sat there for a few moments until I heard my phone vibrate. I flickered my eyes open and just looked at it before picking it up and looking at who texted me.  
My heart stopped when I saw Cameron's name pop up in my message box.

11:03 pm, Cameron Kat:  
hey cecil whats up

11:03 pm, Me:  
Nothing hbu

I replied quickly and set my phone back down. Wasn't he at that party thing? The fact that he actually texted me gave me a weird feeling in my stomach. As I sat there and waited for him to reply I began to feel anxious. It always feels like forever when waiting for a text or a call from someone you want to hear from.

11:05 pm, Cameron Kat:  
just this party. it fuckin blows dick. o uhm i noticed u were actin weird aftr we got back in the house, was it cuz i hugged u?

11:05 pm, Me:  
Yeah, idk. I guess it just caught me a little off guard. Idk.  
How's the party and stuff? :\

11:08 pm, Cameron Kat:  
o im sorry. i really do like hangin out with u tho. & uh the party is ight, nick is off somewhere idk where so im just sitting here by myself already. he's so fuckin stupid

11:09 pm, Me:  
I like hanging out with you, too.  
&Really? He just left you by yourself? That's so fucked up for real.

11:12 pm, Cameron Kat:  
i want to see u again tho, yknow like go somewhere n chill. &yup

11:12 pm, Me:  
Really? Tbh, I want to hangout with you again, too.

11:13 pm, Cameron Kat:  
seriously? cuz i actually think we could get along really well

11:14 pm, Me:  
You think so?

I got up, leaving my phone on my pillow. I was so hungry and couldn't take it anymore. As I walked down the stairs and into the kitchen my stomach fluttered. It was that ridiculous 'butterfly' feeling you get when you think something good or exciting is going to happen. I opened the fridge and squinted my eyes at the light. The whole house was dark since Carrie goes to sleep around ten because he has to wake up early for modeling. I looked over the food in the fridge and saw some pie on a plate and grabbed it. Carrie always baked different kinds of sweets when he's bored or home alone.  
I got a fork from the drawer and set it on the plate, also grabbing a Gatorade from the table. Nick probably left it out before he went to the party. I took the things back to my room and placed them on my desk. I grabbed my phone before sitting down.

11:15 pm, Cameron Kat:  
i really do, yea. idk i like u

11:16 pm, Cameron Kat:  
i dont think i like nick as a bf anymore

11:19 pm, Me:  
You like me? Haha, that's certainly a first for me. I like you, too.  
& What do he mean? Did he do something to make you not like him anymore? Well, besides being an asshole.

I picked the fork up and took the wrapping off the pie, taking a bite. It was apple pie with a hit of chocolate. The taste was rather different but it was delicious. Carrie had always been a great baker. I took a few more bites than unscrewed the cap to the Gatorade. "Hm..." I nibbled a little bit at my lip than looked at my phone. I was so anxious for him to text me back. Having him tell me that he likes me kind of excited me in a way. It was kind of an uneasy feeling, though. I took a sip of the Gatorade when my phone vibrated.

11:26 pm, Cameron Kat:  
sorry had to take a bong hit &yes i like u cecil. n idk he has been bein a dick to me n i hate it n its gettin on my nerves honestly. n i think i like someone else i think

11:27 pm, Me:  
So there's drugs there? :\  
& Nick is a dick... Well, he wasn't before. Idk whats been wrong with him.  
&& You like someone else?

I hated drugs. They pretty much ruined Nick. I know that Cameron has been smoking weed for the longest time, but I can't help but to feel a little bothered by it.  
I finished the pie and sipped on the Gatorade until it was already almost gone. What did he mean by liking someone else? Did he meet another person at the party? I frowned, sighed, than grabbed my phone after finishing the Gatorade and walked over to my bed. I plugged my phone into the charger than sat down on my bed for a moment, rubbing my eyes. I heard my phone vibrate, but instead of answering I got up to turn my light off and then walked back to my bed. The blankets were soft as I nuzzled down into them. I grabbed my phone.

11:34 pm, Cameron Kat:  
yea there r alot of drugs but i only smoke pot so its ok  
n yea i like someone else, alot i think

11:36 pm, Me:  
I guess :\  
Really? Haha, if you don't mind my asking who? :T

I wiggled in my bed. It was so warm and comfortable. My eyes were beginning to get heavy, but I didn't want to sleep. I want to talk to Cameron. I want to stay up and wait for his text messages, but my eyes were getting heavy and every time I blinked it hurt to reopen them. I couldn't help it anymore, my eyes stayed closed and I was out.

I wiggled my feet and grunted as I woke up, rubbing my eyes and just laying there. Suddenly, I remembered I was texting him last night. I sat up quickly and grabbed my phone off the charger. It was almost ten o'clock and I was exhausted. My hair probably looked awful and I felt dirty and knew I needed a shower. I scrolled through my messages until I got to the ones from Cameron from last night.

11:39 pm, Cameron Kat:  
thats for me to kno and u to find out

11:43 pm, Cameron Kat:  
cecil?

11:47 pm, Cameron Kat:  
u sleepin?

11:58 pm, Cameron Kat:  
well uh sleep good n stuff

9:07 am, Cameron Kat:  
good mornin, im comin over to get nick aroun 11 n we r goin to the mall  
tell him u wanna go to

I blinked, shocked as I read through the messages a second time and looked at the time. It was ten. I had an hour to get ready so I jumped up and made a dash for the bathroom. I turned the shower on warm, slowly took my clothes off and climbed into the shower. It felt amazing, I closed my eyes as the warm water slid down my face and back. As I stood there, I remembered a time when Nick offered to get in the shower with me. He told me that I'd like it and I remember the exact way he cupped my cheek in his hand. Nick had used to be so kind to me.. What happened to him? I sighed and frowned as I grabbed the shampoo, pouring some in my hand. The way he mixed the shampoo in my hair... those were the days he actually treated me so kind and gently. Nick would do everything for me and go everywhere with me. He wouldn't even leave my side as if he were my loyal puppy. We even slept in the same bed and the way he held me... The way he spoke to me was so soft..  
As I washed the shampoo from my hair I thought of all the summers we went to the beach together. It was like he was obsessed with me and he treated me with all the respect in the world. At the time, I was completely convinced by his shallow words and actions that he had loved me. I couldn't get in the ocean when we went to the beach. It was far to cold for me, Nick knew that and he would sit out in the sand with me everyday. We would walk the shores at nighttime, he would hold my hand. It wasn't until a little under two years ago that he started treating me so differently. He was never home, never slept in the same bed as me, he even stopped going places with me. Than Cameron came along. At the time, I thought that Cameron had taken my place. I would always second guess about the way Nick felt about me because there is always random moments where he holds me, touches me, speaks to me like he used to. I can blame the drugs all I want, but to this day and this very moment I could never understand why he stopped showing me affection.  
I wrinkled my nose and frowned. As I grabbed the conditioner I realize that I have absolutely no more feelings for Nick. He is who he is now and I could never change that even if I tried. But now that I think about it.. I've never tried. I've never had the courage to call him out. Maybe one day.  
I washed the conditioner out of my hair and got out of the shower, turning it off as I did so. I grabbed the towel off the hanger behind the door and wrapped it around myself, leaving the bathroom.  
"Oh, Cecil! Good morning!" Carrie's voice was always the most lovely.  
I ran my fingers through my wet hair. "Hey, Carrie." I smiled a little.  
"Why up so early?" He smiled at me and leaned against the door frame to his room with that light brown curly hair and the usual white sweatpants and vintage pink tee.  
"Oh, uhm.. I'm actually going somewhere with Nick and Cameron this morning." I admitted and shrugged my shoulders.  
"Really? That's wonderful!" Carrie cheered, his smile getting slightly bigger. "That's great, really."  
"I guess so," I said as I started walking toward my bedroom, "It'll be different I guess."  
"Well, be all means, I hope you have a wonderful day, Cecil." Carrie smiled at me and went on his way down the stairs.  
"Thanks... Me too." I murmured as I shut the door to my room.  
When I looked at the clock, I freaked. It was already ten-thirty and Cameron said he'd be here around eleven. I picked my phone up and texted him, telling him that I'll be ready and to let Nick know that I was going also.  
I cleaned up the floor of my room by putting the dirty clothes in the laundry basket. I grabbed my hair dryer from the closet and plugged it in. As I began to dry my hair, I thought of Carrie. Carrie is a very compassionate and kindhearted man that, for some odd reason, gets mistreated by many people that he meets. Carrie would never even hurt a fly. He's even a vegetarian due to the fact that he thinks animal cruelty is 'dreadful'.  
Carrie models quite frequently enough to be able to call it a full-time job because every other model he meets always likes him. So why don't average everyday people? I'm not even quite sure of that. Although Nick has decided to treat me completely different, there was not one day that goes by where he wouldn't stick up for Carrie. Nick loves Carrie, this was well obvious. Whenever someone even looked at Carrie with an odd stare, Nick would confront him later when Carrie either walked away or turned his back.  
I unplugged the hair dryer, put it away, and got out my flat iron. Now I just needed to sit and wait for it to heat up, so I stood and began to look for an outfit to wear. Average Hollister blue jeans, an Alesana t-shirt, and my purple Pac Sun jacket with the silver design on it and the fake animal fur in the hood. The flat iron was just about heated as I sat down in front of my mirror.  
I thought about the time when someone said something to spite Carrie and then turned and laughed about it with their friends. Later that night Nick and I spent an hour trying to find them just so Nick could beat the shit out of the kid that mocked his brother. I stayed out of it, of course. I could still hear exactly what Nick said to them: "Watch your mouth, piece of shit! Making fun of people is as low as it gets!" In which sense if very true. Nick would do anything for Carrie. Ever since I was old enough to realize it, Nick and Carrie never fought. Nick listened and respected Carrie to the fullest.  
At that moment, I heard the front door open and Carrie go to greet someone. I just finished my hair and unplugged my flat iron, leaving it on my desk as I pulled my shoes on and grabbed my IPhone. I bounced down the stairs and saw Cameron standing there talking to Carrie. Cameron was beautiful and as those pale eyes turned to look at me, my heart skipped a beat. I blinked then looked away, my shyness wouldn't let me look at him and the butterflies in my stomach fluttered violently.  
"I'll go get Nick, then." Carrie smiled as he turned and left for the basement and with the way he glanced at me I knew he was giving me time to actually talk to Cameron before Nick would come up and take over most of the attention.  
"Hey." Cameron's sensuous voice had a rather inviting tone to it and before I knew it, he was right in front of me. I was still standing on the steps so our gazes just matched. He was wearing the same black hat from yesterday, a pair of black jeans, and a dark gray hoodie. His silver piercings had a slight glint to them.  
"You fell asleep on me last night." He stated, tilting his head to the side a bit.  
"U-Uhm." I began to feel my cheeks reddening. "Y-Yeah I know." I bit down on my lower lip and looked away. He was standing close enough to me that I could smell a light trace of pot, but the cologne was able to cover most of the potent scent.  
"Its alright. I was just bored and wanted to talk to you." I glanced back at him to catch him grinning at me when suddenly I remembered.  
"What did you mean last night when you said, uh.. That you liked someone and that it was for you to know and me to find out?" I knitted my eyebrows and blinked, but at that moment we heard Nick coming up the stairs.  
"Cameron! You here!?" We heard him yell from what seemed like half way up the steps.  
"Yeah." Cameron mumbled as he walked over to the living room couch and sat down. He didn't answer my question.  
"Well hey!" Nick grinned as he stood in the doorway in his usual flamboyant get-up. He wore a dark maroon pair of skinny jeans, a black shirt with big white capital letters that read 'Kisses fo' free!', a pair of colorful DC brand shoes.  
"Crazy shit last night, eh?" Nick smirked then walked over to the closet door, grabbing out a white jacket that he put on and zipped up half way.  
I saw Cameron roll his eyes knowing that Nick couldn't see it. "Yeah, man."  
"You were like on your phone for the whole beginning, what the fuck was up with all that?" Nick raised one eyebrow as he headed to the door and then stopped and looked at me.  
"What do you mean what was up with it? I'm not a party person and you know that." Cameron stood and adjusted his sweatshirt.  
"Yeah, whatever." Nick shrugged it off and then smiled at me. "So you goin' with us, Cecil? Sweet."  
He didn't even give me the chance to answer as he opened the front door, and walked out. I said goodbye to Carrie and shut the door behind me as I followed Cameron out of the house. Nick was already in the passenger seat of the car and after Cameron got into the driver's side, I climbed into the back. The car engine started up and we backed slowly out of the driveway. Nick reached for the radio and turned on some sort of tech-no music. I winced at how loud he made it. It was still quite early in the morning and my ears had yet to adjust to the sounds.  
We arrived to the mall and Cameron parked the car and as we all got out I was relived that the loud music was gone.  
"And here we are!" Nick cheered as he looked back and Cameron and I who were a few steps behind him. "Ay Cecil!" He slowed his pace to throw his arm around me as we began to walk into the mall, Cameron was the one behind us now. "Its pretty cool that you decided you wanted to come with us, hm?" Nick's piercing brown eyes lingered on my face for a moment, waiting for my answer.  
"Yeah, sure." I murmured and shivered at temperature change in the mall. It was a lot warmer in here than it was outside. I looked around, a sullen dull expression on my face. In some sort of way I didn't want to be here. The chatter of the people in the mall, the music coming from all different kinds of stores. It wasn't as crowded as I had expected it to be, but than again its not even twelve yet. Nick grinned and removed his arm from around my shoulders. "Man, I need a cigarette." He groaned then stopped and looked around. "Where to first!?" He turned and looked at Cameron.  
"I don't care." Cameron spoke unenthusiastically.  
Nick's eyebrows furrowed and his smile dropped, "What the hell has gotten into you?" He crossed his arms as he walked next to Cameron, I was a few steps behind them just listening.  
"Nothing." Cameron snapped back at Nick. "Don't make a scene here, Nick."  
"What the fuck?" Nick's eyes widened for a brief moment. "You've been actin so weird lately and then last night you don't even talk to me! And then this mornin you don't even bother coming down and sayin' hi or nothin!"  
Cameron took a deep breath than slid his hands into his pockets. "You're right. I'm sorry. Hasn't been a good week, chill."  
Nick rolled his eyes and grunted. "Whatever." He turned and walked into some shoe store, Cameron followed. I stood outside the store and just waited and as I waited I began to think. Cameron and Nick are completely opposite people. Nick is the kind that loves public places and he loves to go places and do things. Nick is a very social kind of person, but when something doesn't go his way he gets attitude. Cameron, on the other hand, is more laid-back and seems like he'd prefer to stay at home or only with a friend or two. He's quite and secretive. Everyone knows Nick and everything about him. What I also noticed was Nick is kind of treating Cameron the same way he was treating me before he decided to completely forget about ever caring for me.  
When I actually realized that Nick and I were 'falling apart' was the time when I caught him fooling around with someone else in the basement. It was a girl though so I kind of understood at the time if he had wanted some female attention. He told me that I meant so much more to him. That's when the lies started. He began to go out more and not be around me as much. When I finally confronted him on his actions the only think he told me was; "Oh? From what I understand we were never together." This caught me completely off guard and I was so confused. I didn't know how to think of it. Now, don't get me wrong, Nick isn't always mean to me until it comes to my feelings. He'll take me places as long as he has someone else there so he doesn't have to talk to me. Nick overall ignores me when there are other people around, but when we are at home he talks to me.  
I sighed and ran my fingers through my hair. I still don't completely understand what happened to Nick, but I do remember the first time he got mad at me for something I have no control over. There was this one time when we were at the beach and even though I was there he was flirting it up with this group of people. At that time I just sat there and let him treat me this way. I wasn't feeling to good that evening and I fainted. Every time I faint, I need someone to wake me up with my medicine and that person was always Nick. I thought everything was alright after he had woken me up, but apparently the attention sort of switched to me and I suppose he didn't really like that. Later that night he yelled at me as if I fainted on purpose just to switch the attention to myself. After that he never took me out around his friends.  
I do realize now that Nick has attention issues. He constantly needs attention and will do anything it takes to get it. This might be due to the fact his parents pretty much up and left him. Its not like they don't exist and they do come home for all holidays such as Christmas and Easter. They also send money in to support them every month. Carrie and Nick have never really told me about their parents in detail and I never really bothered to ask.  
"Yeah, well you always do stupid shit and I can't stand it." Nick muttered as he and Cameron walked out of the shoe store.  
"Yeah." Cameron sighed as he walked beside Nick. I began to follow them on Nick's other side, two steps behind them.  
"Oh! I need to go in here, alright?" Nick walked into Pac Sun, the clothing store that he gets everything he wears from.  
"I have to follow him in or he'll bitch at me." Cameron frowned as he spoke to me.  
"Alright. I'll just come in, too..." I didn't make eye contact as we walked into the store. Cameron slowly walked over to where Nick was, dragging his feet against the floor. I just started looking through the girl jeans since the boy styles never fit my tiny figure.  
"Cecil?" I heard a female voice call my name from behind me so I turned around, curious.  
"That is you!" Her voice was already annoying me and her long blonde hair swayed as she bounced over to greet me with a hug that I wasn't comfortable with at all.  
"Oh, uhm.." I looked at her and blinked, raising one of my eyebrows for a moment.  
"Its, you know, Tina!" She smiled brightly as she looked at me, her brown eyes didn't match the obviously fake blonde hair.  
"Oh, yeah.." I didn't remember this girl at all.  
"You dropped out of school or something and I never saw you again! I missed you." She bit her lower lip as if she thought it was attractive or something. I gave her a once over. She wore a very tiny skirt with see through black leggings, a jacket, a very low cut shirt so her breasts were pretty much hanging out all over the place.  
"Yeah, I guess." I muttered, expressionless. I glanced at Nick and Cameron for a moment because I could feel their stares.  
"Well." Tina said as she leaned over and took my hand into hers, also taking a pen from her pocket. It took me a moment to find her name tag hidden by her jacket. "I get off around seven tonight if, you know, you're not doing anything." She wrote her number down on my hand. I narrowed my eyes than finally got up enough courage to look at hers. She wore way to much black make-up.  
"We could reconnect," Tina giggled the most annoying sound I've ever heard, "Y'know? I could come over and we could hangout!" I honestly wanted her to just stop talking to me. I wasn't in the mood to deal with obnoxious skanks.  
"I will give you a call then..." I said and turned my head to look at Nick and Cameron. "I have to go right now, though."  
"Oh! Okay! But you'll call me, right?" She smiled again and leaned over to hug me. I could feel her boobs pressing against my chest.  
"Yeah. I will, sure." And that was the end of that. I quickly walked over to Nick and Cameron. "I want to go to Fishbone." Anything to just get out of here because I didn't want her to talk to me again. Since when do girls talk to me? More or less, since when do they _hit _on me?  
After we walked out of the store Nick bumped me with his elbow. "Score for Cecil!" He winked at me and snickered. "You probably won't even call the chick!" He laughed as if to mock me. I narrowed my eyes and frowned.  
"I actually plan to." I muttered and from the corner of my eye I saw Cameron's eyes widen for just a second before shaking his head.  
Nick seemed shocked. "Really?"  
I didn't answer his question and just walked into Fishbone. I began to aimlessly browse through the things that were there. I wasn't interested in any of this stuff. Should I actually call this girl? If anything I knew that she wanted to fool around. I could tell. Whenever I was around Nick and a bunch of girls were flirting with him they would giggle and touch him and hug him with their boobs. Girls weren't much of a score for me. I hate them.  
I felt my phone vibrate in my pocket. I pulled my phone from my pocket and saw a message from Cameron which was him asking me if I was actually going to call the girl. I didn't bother texting back and just put my phone back into my pocket. As I kept browsing I heard Nick whispering to Cameron so I listened.  
"Are your parents home?" Nick whispered. My back was to them so I couldn't see their faces.  
"Uh, probably not." Cameron muttered.  
"I wanna go back to your place after we leave here and drop Cecil off."  
"Yeah sure. I wanna get fuckin stoned anyway." Cameron's voice got a little lower when he mentioned getting stoned.  
"Me too, plus I kinda wanna fool aroun, y'know?" I heard Nick giggle a little bit and than I decided to walk further away so I couldn't hear them. If Cameron was just going to screw around with Nick then I didn't want anything to do with him. How could he sit and tell me all these things around how he didn't like Nick anymore and then go off and fool around with him? I was getting angry and wanted to go home. I was getting jealous and I wanted to call this girl the moment she got out of work. I wasn't jealous of the fact that Cameron was going to fool around with Nick. I was jealous because I wanted to hangout with him and I wanted to talk to him. The more and more I thought about it the more angry I was beginning to get. I turned around to face them.  
"Nick! I want to go home now. I have school to do." They both looked up at me.  
"Alright, alright! Carrie has been complaining a lot about that recently." Nick said as he tugged on Cameron's jacket as if to tell him to follow.

The ride home was the same. Loud music and no one spoke. I sat in the back with my face buried in my IPhone 4 just looking up meaningless things. I got on my Facebook and friend requested that girl from Pac Sun, Tina Meekins. I transferred her number from my arm to my contact list than licked my thumb and tried to scrub the number off my skin. We stopped for food on the way home, Cameron paid. I got a cheeseburger, a small fry, and a water. Nick just got a smoothie and Cameron got fries.  
We pulled into the driveway and I opened the door. "Bye." I muttered as I shut the car door, not giving Nick or Cameron the chance to say goodbye to me. I took the house key from my jacket pocket and opened the door. Carrie wasn't home and was probably not going to get back until later tonight. Sometimes he just stays over night because the modeling site is about an hour away and he has friends he can stay with. Once again the house is all mine. I'm all alone. I take my food and drink into the kitchen and set it at the dining room table. On my way up to my room I flicked the dining and living room lights on. I grabbed my laptop off of my bed, leaving my bedroom light on and walking down the stairs. I stopped in the living room and turned on the Hit List music channel on the television. I turned it up than proceeded to the dining room where my food sat, still warm. As I sat down at the table, I sighed, placing my laptop in front of me and opened it. I took my food out of the bag and began eating as I waited for my computer to start up. It was pretty quick. I logged in and finished eating my food, putting the trash back into the bag and leaving the water on the table as I got up and threw the trash away. The music made the house feel slightly less empty and motivated me although I didn't like any of the songs that played. I opened my Cyber school and sat there, looking at it. As if I felt like doing this now, but I knew well that I should. I opened my Science work and began to copy and paste the questions into Google to get the answers. Easy.  
I jumped when my phone vibrated. I took it out of my pocket and glanced at the time. It was almost three and I probably got home around two or so. The message was from Cameron.

2:48 pm, Cameron Kat:  
ey cecil whats up

I scowled as I read the message. He had some nerve to text me, but than again he doesn't know that I over-heard his conversation with Nick. I finished the question I was working on and texted him back.

2:51 pm, Me:  
Doing school. What about you?

2:52 pm, Cameron Kat:  
just gettin high n uh i noticed that something was wrong maybe? u ok ?

2:52 pm, Me:  
Heard your conversation with Nick. Way to go. You say all that shit to me and then just go and do whatever. Idc.

2:54 pm, Cameron Kat:  
thats not how it is. im not gonna fool aroun with him cecil. y wud it matter

2:56 pm, Me:  
What do you mean why would it matter!? You told me that you didn't like him like that & you told me that you didn't have feelings for him & people that don't have feelings for another shouldn't just around and fool around with them or whatever! It pisses me the fuck off, Cameron. Nick is probably bitching that you're texting so don't bother texting me back. Goodbye.

I grunted and sat my phone down next to my computer. I didn't want to talk to him at all so I focused my attention onto my school work. Copy and paste, copy and paste. Then I realized that I haven't fainted at all today. It was strange. Normally I faint at most two or three times a day, but the doctor did say a while back that my immune system and my body will have better days than others and not to freak out or anything if I go a day without fainting. Today is the first day all year that I haven't fainted. Usually at the end of these kinds of days the doctor said I might feel a little bit sick and there is a possibility that I could throw up. The vibration of my phone shook me from my thoughts, but I stayed focused on my school and just decided to ignore the messages for a while until I kept receiving more. I promised myself I wouldn't reply, just read them.

3:04 pm, Cameron Kat:  
cecil plz i wont fool aroun with him! he's stoned n downstairs makin food plz text me cecil

3:04 pm, Cameron Kat:  
i dont like him! i like someone else i actually like someone, i never like any1 but i think i found a person i like so plz dont ignore me cecil i'll tell him that i dont want to mess around anymore i promise i just want to talk to u

3:07 pm, Cameron Kat:  
cecil? i kno its wrong that i said those things n i kno that u think im gonna fool aroun with him but i wont cuz i dont want to cuz i like someone now

3:11 pm, Cameron Kat:  
ok so ur not gonna answer me cool well i dont wanna text u about something i want to tell u, i want to see u n i'll explain shit ok? cuz i like somone1 that i kno could treat me good n i want to tell u about them & text me when u feel like it, bye

I read through all of the message and frowned. He made it clearly obvious that he likes someone and my curiosity was killing me. I want to know who he was talking about and why he's making it sound so urgent. His text messages were starting to sound a little desperate for me not to be mad at him. My brain was rather frazzled. I closed my eyes and pinched the bridge of my nose for a moment, letting out a sigh before opening my eyes again. I bit down on my lower lip and than concentrated on my school work again. Copy and paste. Science class was just about finished.  
My boredom led me to actually text this Tina girl.

5:16 pm, Me:  
Hello.

5:18 pm, Tina Meekins:  
who's this.?

5:18 pm, Me:  
Cecil Dagan.

5:20 pm, Tina Meekins:  
oh,.! cecil  
Oh brother. I rolled my eyes as I read this message. So she was the kind of slut that completely just sucks up to you. So easy. I sighed as I texted her back.

5:23 pm, Me:  
Nothing really. What time do you get out of work?

5:25 pm, Tina Meekins:  
well i told u that i get out at 7 but its actually 6:30.! so u want me to come over 3(;

5:26 pm, Me:  
Yeah, come right on over. ;)

I laughed to myself when I typed the wink face. I figured that I'd just play along and flirt right back. Why not? She's just a slut anyway.

5:28 pm, Tina Meekins:  
oooo  
5:30 pm, Me:  
Anything you want ;)

5:32 pm, Tina Meekins:  
well ive been a really lonely girl  
5:32 pm, Me:  
I've been a lonely boy.

I shook my head and got on the Mozilla Firefox. I navigated to Facebook and typed her name in the search bar. My phone vibrated, but I was to busy reading what her Facebook page said. She was single, obviously. Seventeen years old with pictures of her in her bikini along with over five-hundred friends. How could someone have over five-hundred friends? The only reason my friends got into the thousands was because I guess I look like a 'scene' kid because of my hair. That reminded me that I wanted to go through and delete everyone I don't know or like. I answered her messages and deleted people off my Facebook simultaneously.

5:33 pm, Tina Meekins:  
i can make you not so lonely tonight (; we can get down and dirty  
5:37 pm, Me:  
That sounds good to me. Do whatever you want.

5:39 pm, Tina Meekins:  
ooo boy u bet i will  
I blinked and grinned. This could actually be quite entertaining so I decided that I'd go a little bit into detail with this. I thought it was funny how easy girls are these days and how easy it is to get them to do things.

5:42 pm, Me:  
Oh girl you can do anything you want to me.

5:44 pm, Tina Meekins:  
u bet i will (; but what will u do to me? (;

5:46 pm, Me:  
It depends how you want it.

What am I kidding? I couldn't talk dirty to save my own life. I'm not good at it and don't really know how. "Uhg..." I groaned and ran my fingers over the keyboard of my computer, typing a Facebook status: 'Hanging out with Tina Meekins around 7' And that was that.

5:50 pm, Tina Meekins:  
i dont care how it is as long as its hard (;

5:56 pm, Me:  
Of course it'll be hard. 3

I texted her my address than turned my computer off and carried it up to my room where I sat on the bed for a moment. She should be here any moment now and all I could do was wait. I thought about if I'd like doing sexual things with a girl or not. Honestly, I wasn't sure. I went down to the basement and searched around for some of Nick's cologne, spraying myself a few times and rolling my eyes. I know that I might regret this, but what happens will happen. I heard the doorbell ring.  
I walked over to the door, unlocked it and opened it to see her face. I held the door for her.  
"Wow! What a cute place!" She bounced in through the front door, kicking her shoes off and looking around. "Do you live here by yourself?" Tina giggled as she sat down on the couch. I could feel her eyes on me.  
"Hmm. No. I don't, actually." I murmured as I shut the door and turned to look at her. Here goes nothing.  
"Oh. Well, it doesn't seem like anyone is home." Tina stood up and slowly walked closer to me, tracing her finger along my jaw, trailing her finger tip down the length of my neck. "I'd like to have some fun with you, Cecil." Her smile was rather sinister. I knew that I was giving her what she wanted.  
I blinked my eyes than looked into her's for a moment. We were about the same height, eye to eye. "I'm all yours." I licked my lower lip nervously as I watched her slowly take her coat off, dropping it to the floor. Tina leaned over and rested her lips right on mine, they were soft. I took a step closer to her, gently opening my mouth to guide my tongue into her mouth to caress her's. I was nervous and wasn't exactly sure what to do. I didn't want to be the dominant one, I've always been the submissive type. I shivered as she broke our kiss and began sucking delicately on my jaw, my neck. My eyes were forced closed as I slightly leaned into the kisses. "Take my clothes off." I heard her whisper against my neck as her kisses got closer and closer to my neck, she nibbled on my ear.  
Tina was wearing a button up blouse that showed a great amount of cleavage and a short shirt with black leggings. She must have changed her shirt before she got to my house. "Hmmm..." I purred as she continued to kiss and suck the length of my neck. I lightly brushed my finger tips against her waist, guiding my fingers against the curves of her body until I delicately slipped my fingers into her blouse. I didn't like the feel of a woman. I hated the curves and softness of her lips. I pulled my fingers away. I didn't want this.  
"Oh, you're so shy." She whispered. I didn't like the sound of a woman's voice in my ear. It made me slightly cringe.  
Tina reached her hand down my pants and grabbed me through my boxers. My eyes widened in shock. "U-Uhm.." Tina began to move more quickly, grinding against me as she slipped her hand into my boxers. I flinched backwards a bit, but her grip on me was rather tight. "You told me you'd be hard for me." Tina whispered as she began to suck on my neck again. In fact I wasn't hard at all. I didn't like this and I regretted inviting her over.. I just wanted to be with Cameron.  
"I can fix that." She whispered. I saw her grin as she pulled away from me, taking her hand back. Tina giggled as she took my hand and led me to the couch, pushing me down. "You're a quiet one." She giggled again before kneeling in front of me, her fingers fooled around with the button of my jeans. I was to much of a coward to actually tell her to stop. She slowly pulled my zipper down and as she began pulling my pants and boxers off of me, my body tensed. She pulled my pants down to my ankles than slipped her fingers around my exposed heat. My jaw clenched tightly as she stroked me quickly and roughly. It hurt in a way. I squeezed my eyes closed and rested my head back against the couch. "Hnn..." I tried my hardest not to moan, but when I felt her moist lips press against my head I instantly went hard. "Hhhaa..." I moaned quietly, keeping my eyes closed.  
"Oh, you like that?" I heard her whisper before she took my whole head into her mouth and began to suck gently. I was surely turned on, but I didn't want this feeling with her. I wanted it with him... He was on my mind.. I felt her take more into her mouth and begin to suck more violently, swirling her tongue around the head. I bit down on my lower lip and turned my head, a slight arch in my back. I reached my hand down and laced my fingers through her hair. It felt so good and its been so long since I've had attention. I felt her pull her mouth off, but pressing her lips to the tip and sucking. This was driving me crazy. "Hahhh..." I mumbled as she flickered her tongue around it. "Mmmm.." My body tensed as she stopped. I could feel her eyes on me so I slowly opened mine and glanced down at her. Tina giggled and stood up, slowly pulling her blouse off. I watched her as she unstrapped her bra and let it fall to the floor along with the blouse. "You're a quiet one, Cecil.." She licked her lips. I hated the way she said my name, it made my eyes narrow. Tina than slowly reached up her skirt and began pulling her leggings and lacy panties off. I blinked as she pulled off her skirt and kept my eyes on her neck and shoulders. I hated the female body. I didn't like her lips, her curves, her breasts, her legs. "Uhm..." I furrowed my eyebrows as she slowly crawled right on top of me. I pressed my body back into the couch. I didn't want this, I didn't want to do this. Tina giggled as she rubbed her wetness against my hard. I bit down hard on my lips, turning my head and squeezing my eyes closed.  
Suddenly, a knock at the door. My eyes widened as Tina jumped off of me as quickly as she could. "Is that your parents!?" She yanked all of her clothes on as fast as she could. I was in total shock, speechless. I was saved. Quickly, I stood up and pulled my pants up. "Y-Yeah..!" My voice slightly cracked as I adjusted myself in my pants. "My parents, mhm!" I leaned over and picked up her coat for her, handing it to her. "There's a back door! Go out through there, okay?" Tina nodded and I watched her as she scrambled over to the back door, letting herself out. Another knock at the door. I took a deep breath as I buttoned and zipped up my pants. My hands were shaky as I reached for the door knob, opening the door. It was Carrie, my savior.  
"Cecil?" Carrie blinked and walked into the house, shutting the door behind him.  
My face was flustered and I was getting a bad feeling. I quickly backed up to sit on the couch, closing my eyes. It hurts.  
"Oh, dear.." I felt Carried arms around me. He sat down on the couch next to me. I leaned into him and squeezed my eyes closed. "It'll be okay, love." The soft caring melody of Carrie's voice usually seemed to help, but not this time. I was on the verge of fainting and more recently its been hurting me so much. Clenching my jaw, I took a deep breath and winced at the pain that shot through my whole body from the tip of my toes to the top of my head. Tears trickled down my cheeks as I inhaled deeply through my nose and that was it. My body fell limp in Carrie's arms.

I wiggled my body against the sheets and blanket. This didn't feel like my bed, but I didn't want to open my eyes to find out. I was far to comfortable and warm to even care to know where I was. There was silence. I was half dreaming and half awake. I rubbed my feet together, they were warm for once. As I slowly twisted and turned in the bed I realized where I was. I opened my eyes to darkness. I forgot the sun went down and was expecting it to be morning. There was a small nightlight plugged into the wall that illuminated the room in very dim shades of blue. It was Carrie's room. He must have changed something because it wasn't how I had remembered it. Carrie liked the Renaissance, which was how his room was themed a few years ago. I suppose he changed it. It was very modern. All of the furniture was glass and mirrors. Everything was either white or pink. As I sat up I coughed, closing my eyes and sitting as perfectly still as I could. My stomach was upset. I groaned and slowly got out of Carrie's bed, exiting the room.  
The first thing I thought of was my phone. I dragged my feet as I walked into my room and pulled my phone off of the charger. It was a little after nine o'clock. I had several messages from Tina Meekins, Cameron Kat, and even one from Nick. I texted Tina and told her that I wasn't into girls and that I just wanted to try it out. I also told her that I don't associate with slutty girls and not to text me anymore. After that I got a bunch of messages from her and some random numbers that apparently were her friends. I ignored them all. Next, I read Cameron's. He was asking me what I was doing tonight and that he needed to talk to me. I completely forgot that I stopped texting him earlier today. With a sigh, I texted him back and told him that I could hangout whenever, I guess. Than I read Nick's. All it said was that he wanted to hangout with me tomorrow. I narrowed my eyes and frowned. I wonder if Cameron told him that he didn't want to fool around with him anymore? My little heart began to race. What if this was that talk where Nick was going to tell me that he didn't want me to hangout with Cameron? No. He wouldn't tell me anything, he'd just immediately bitch at me. But who is he to tell me what I can and can't do? If I want to see Cameron and if Cameron wants to see me than so be it. I wouldn't let Nick treat me like shit or control my actions any longer. I don't even understand why I ever did before. I texted Nick back and told him alright and that I'll be home.  
Suddenly, I heard the doorbell ring. This startled me and made me jump. I heard Carrie open the door.  
"Oh, Cameron. Where is Nick?" I barely heard Carrie say.  
What was Cameron doing here and not Nick? I furrowed my eyebrows and sat on the edge of my bed. I texted Nick, asking him where he was and that Carrie wanted to know.  
"He wanted me to take him to, uh... James' house or whatever." I could recognize Cameron's deep voice from anywhere. "Is Cecil home?"  
I blinked in shock at the fact he asked for me. I leaped off my bed and grabbed my yellow v-neck shirt with the thin white horizontal stripes to change into. I pulled my pants off and replaced those with a pair of gray sweatpants with pockets. Quickly, I grabbed all the dirty clothes off my floor and put them in my laundry basket.  
"Yes, he's right up stairs. I'm not sure if he's sleeping or not." Carrie said, his voice humble.  
I heard footsteps marching up the stairs. He was here. To see me. I felt my heart thud in my stomach, my back, my neck, my ears. A knock at my door.  
"...Come in." I stated as I grabbed my phone, leaving it on the charger. I needed to look like I was busy doing something.  
Cameron slowly opened my bedroom door, stepping it and shutting it. I looked up to see a serious look on his face. Something was obviously wrong. "C-Cameron...?" I whispered, the look on his face was one I hadn't seen before. There seemed to mix of anxiousness... and nervousness? Maybe distress?  
He walked toward me quickly and was leaned down inches away from my face before I could even blink. I felt my eyes widen, a blush beginning to redden my face. Cameron lifted my chin with his thumb and index finger while gently tilting his head to the side and hovering his lips over mine. My mind couldn't quite capture what was going on, nothing was registering. Was this a dream? I wanted to lean in and kiss him, but the shock had me frozen. Cameron finally pressed his lips hesitantly against mine. My eyes closed. His lips were warm, thicker than mine, and... He pulled away and stood, glancing out my window, his fingers gently touching his lips. I looked up at him, confusion could obviously be seen on my flustered face.  
"Cecil..." That voice, "You're the one. The one I like.. Its you." He met my stare with those eyes. They had an.. affectionate glint to them. I knew he could see the shock on my face, I hadn't moved. "That day day when we went to my house an' when I was talkin' to you... Something.." He sat down on the bed in front of me. He tapped his head with his index finger, "Something.. _clicked_." Cameron looked down and away from me, as if he needed a moment to think about what he needed to say next. "I thought I wanted someone... Outgoing and someone that liked to smoke and party... I though that Nick, being my opposite, would have been perfect for me. Like, y'know, opposites attract?" I listened and just nodded to him, waited for him to go on.  
"I was so fuckin' wrong. I don't want that. I thought I wouldn't find a person, uh... I actually like, but I like you. A lot. You're quiet.. Stubborn.." I saw him grin. "C'mon... Talk to me. You're scarin' me. I feel like a total fuckin' idiot right now. Feedback would be nice, Cecil."  
The truth was, I was so filled with bliss that I didn't have any words. So I smiled. Cameron actually liked me. "Really?" I was able to say. I drew in a nervous breath..

_**to be continued**_


End file.
